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Off to bed now as I have to be up at 5am for the Tour De France cycle race in the moring.
This starts in London for the first time ever and comes right past me.
This has resulted in the biggest mobilisation of Police EVER my my force.

On a more serious note we have had to increase our security alert status as folows:

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist
threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to
"Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to
"Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." Londoners have not been "A Bit
Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out.
Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody
Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance"
warning level was during the great fire of London in 1666.

Elsewhere in Europe, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised
its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two
higher levels in France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate." The rise
was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag
factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.

It's not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of
alert. Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and
Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain:
"Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides." The Germans also
increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress up in
Uniforms and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels:
"Invade a Neighbor" and "Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only
threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to
deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new
Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

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